


we can't come back from this

by hazyfog



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Dom/sub Undertones, F/M, Female Apprentice (The Arcana), First Time, Light Dom/sub, Other, POV Second Person, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, inexperienced apprentice, like barely dom / sub but julians obviously a sub so..., no gendered pronouns are used for the apprentice but they do have afab body, no spoilers for julians route, takes place sometime after the dock scene but before the trial
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:28:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25885843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazyfog/pseuds/hazyfog
Summary: “We should stop, I.. we.. can’t come back from this.”“Julian, I don’t want us to come back from this."It's the apprentice and Julian's first time and the disgraced doctor is predictably in his head about it. Luckily, the apprentice knows how to calm him down.
Relationships: Apprentice/Julian Devorak, Julian Devorak/Reader, Julian Devorak/You
Comments: 2
Kudos: 250





	we can't come back from this

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a few years late to the loving Julian Devorak party, but I'm here with a very nsfw contribution. This is my first time writing anything with an E rating so... go easy on me lol.

You didn’t exactly see this coming. 

One moment you’re standing a few feet apart in Mazelinka’s kitchen after the older woman left to “run some errands that might take a while”, the next you’re horizontal on the bed straddling his long legs (and surprisingly strong thighs) your hands clutching at auburn hair, lips pressed together in a desperate teeth clashing kiss. 

“We, uhh, should.. ” Julian pulls away from you breathlessly, eyes unfocused.

“We should what, Julian?” You lean forward nipping lightly at his bottom lip, for a moment he brings his face back towards you as if to meet your lips but he hesitates again, laying his head back on the pillows with a huff. 

“We should stop, I.. we.. can’t come back from this.” His eyebrows are furrowed, he seems to be stuck in his thoughts as usual. You sigh, knowing Julian as you do by now, you guess you should’ve expected this to happen.

“Julian, I don’t want us to come back from this. I want this- us.” You say softly, reaching for his hands which have fallen from your waist to lay flatly on the bed next to him. You’re still sitting on top of him, shirt half off your shoulders. 

“But I’m not good, I don’t want to.. ruin you.” He frowns, the crease between his eyebrows deepening. You reach up to smooth the line, your other hand still clasped in his. 

“We’ve been over this Julian, you can’t taint me, you won’t hurt me, you’re not bad.” 

“Trust me, I am.” He makes to move you off of him, gloved hands reaching towards you. You grab his hands before he can touch you, pulling them over his head and keeping them pinned with a strong grip on his wrists. His eyes go wide and flash away from your face, breath coming in even more broken puffs out of his slightly swollen lips. 

“What do you want?” You ask him, using your other hand to grab his chin and pull his face to look at yours again. 

“It doesn’t matter what I want..” he mutters.

“What do you want.” You repeat, leaning in so that your noses are nearly pressed together. 

“I don’t want to hurt you, I don’t want to leave my mark on you.” his words are so quiet you strain to hear them. 

“I wish you would.” You say with a smirk, still full of bravado. You wish he would listen to you, trust you, for once. That seems to be enough for him though, and he releases his breath in a near moan, pressing his lips to yours once again. You release his hands, moving yours to cup the sides of his face. His hands go immediately to your back and begin roving under your untucked shirt causing a shiver to go up your spine as his cold gloved hands touch your skin. 

“Take them off.” You say, moving your lips to his neck. You explore his jaw with your lips, biting and kissing as you go, eliciting quiet noises from deep in Julian’s throat. 

“Take what off.” He groans, hands now moving to pull your shirt off over your head.

“Everything.” You bite down on the spot directly beneath his ear causing him to moan, his hips trapped under yours buck up in an unconscious movement. He responds by quickly pulling your shirt the rest of the way off before bringing his hands up to pull his gloves off. 

“Let me.” You say, taking the edge of his gloves between your teeth, pulling one glove then the other off. You meet his eyes and he stares at you in wonder, dazed smile on his face. One by one the clothing leaves both of your bodies. You struggle a little at his belt, his hands reach down to help you as you pull off his fitted trousers. 

Now bared to each other you feel a little shy, your bravado from earlier faltering as you stare down at him. His eyes are roving over your body, his hands move to your shoulders, your arms, pulling you closer to him. He looks up at you then, notices you biting your lip, the look of nerves in your eyes. 

“It’s ok, we can stop.” He says, taking your hands in his and nodding a little to himself as if to affirm his belief that you couldn’t possibly want this with him. 

“I don’t want to stop.” You say breathlessly, but you don’t know where to begin. 

“What do you want then? I quite liked you ordering me around earlier.” He grins wolfishly, it seems his confidence has come back at least. You smile and lean forward to kiss him. 

“Touch me.” You say against his lips. 

“Where?” He groans, hips once again rising to meet yours. You can feel he’s already hard, and the thought that you were able to do that much, without even touching him, gives you the confidence you need to say

“Everywhere.” 

He complies, keeping his lips pressed to yours in a heated kiss as his hand makes its way from your collar bone down to your breasts. He’s gentle, exploratory as he rolls your nipple between two fingers as you groan against his lips. He does it again, taking in your reactions as he continues his explorations of your chest. You pull away from his lips for air and he moves his head down, taking a nipple into his mouth, the other still between his nimble fingers. He sucks on it, careful as always but then he bites down and oh- you didn’t know you could make noises like the one you just made. 

You hadn’t realized you’d been moving your hips against his until he reaches down to still you. 

“If you keep doing that I’ll come and that won’t be much fun for anyone.” He says, his voice deep and rumbling against your chest. You blush, taking a moment to catch your shaky breath. 

“I don’t know, sounds pretty fun to me.” You say, imagining him coming apart beneath you. 

“I have a better idea.” He pulls back to watch your face as he moves his hand down to rest between your legs. Your breath hitches, hips moving forward again seeking friction. He smiles, moving his long fingers closer to your already wet folds. He pulls a finger across you, lifting it up to pop the finger into his mouth, eyes closing as he tastes you. “Mmmm…” he groans. 

“Juliannn….” You keen, missing his fingers on you. He laughs under his breath at your eagerness, slipping  
his fingers back where you want them most. He feels how wet you are and circles your entrance with a finger, watching your reaction intently as he enters you with first one finger, then another. Your groan is caught against his lips as he pulls you in to a kiss, his fingers moving in you with precision. You feel his thumb reach the little bundle of nerves that’s been nearly throbbing since the moment you started kissing him in the kitchen. He circles you with his thumb, picking up the pace as his fingers moving deeper inside of you hit an extra sensitive spot that makes your hips buck in response. You bite his lip, hard, and taste blood. He groans into your mouth, “again”. So you bite him again, soothing his lip with a lick as his fingers continue their steady pace. 

“You’re good at this.” You say in a huff, brain unable to form coherent thought at the moment. 

“Well they did teach me anatomy in school you know.” He smirks. You respond by pulling his swollen bottom lip into your mouth, sucking on it then moving to his neck again, biting and nipping in all the places you now know he likes.

All at once it becomes too much, you sit back on your elbows, he’s got a third finger in you now, his thumb still busy applying just the right pressure to your clit and it’s all you can do to stay sitting upright and breathing. His other hand is on your breasts again and you feel something in you building, it almost feels like magic the way it builds and builds upon itself, like a fire fueling inside of you. The pleasure comes in waves, you mutter Julian’s name under your breath until the wave breaks and you slump forward against him, the light white behind your eyelids. You’re seeing stars, unable to focus on anything but the feeling within you. You’re not sure if you actually cry out or if that was in your head, either way you come to a moment later. His fingers are still working inside you, helping you ride out your orgasm. You bite down on his shoulder, nearly breaking the skin and he smiles down at you. 

“You’re so beautiful.” His eyes are still full of wonder as he looks at you. 

“So are you.” He laughs at that as he gently removes his fingers from you. He flexes his fingers, the sheen of sticky fluid on them glinting in the candlelight. Before you can think you grab his fingers, sucking on them. His eyes are glued to your lips, pupils so dilated his eyes are nearly black. You smile, releasing his fingers and reach your hand down to where you can feel his cock, hard and hot between you.

He lets out a hiss as your fingers wrap around him, you haven’t done this before so you’re not sure how much pressure to apply. He seems to like whatever you’re doing, as you move your hand up and down his already slick length. He buries his head in your shoulder, biting his lip to keep his sounds contained. 

“I want to hear you Julian.” You say, sliding your finger gently over his sensitive tip. He moans, still buried against your shoulder. 

“What was that?” You move your hand down to grip him harder, he hisses again. “I couldn’t hear you.”

“Fuck. Yes, keep- doing- that.” He says between grunting sounds, his voice much louder this time. You grin, loving the power you so easily hold over him. You don’t have any experience with this, but it seems you could do anything to him and he’d like it. His hips move frantically as he thrusts himself into your hand. “I’m going to- come.” He groans. 

“Not yet Julian.” You move your hands to press against his chest. “I want to feel you in me.” You say, all shyness gone. 

“Fuck.” He groans, his eyes are shut and his face looks somewhat pained. “Yes, fuck I want to-“ it seems he can’t form sentences at the moment- for once unable to run his mouth. 

He opens his eyes to look at you. He takes in your toothy, confident grin and rolls his eyes a little. “You seem to be enjoying this.” 

“I very much am.” You lean forward to nip his ear, “Now shut up and fuck me.” He gulps, Adam’s apple bobbing as he takes in the dark look in your eyes. He seems to consider saying something for a minute before thinking better of it and kissing you instead. He’s smiling against your lips as you feel his hands reach down between you to align himself. You’re still on top of him and you lift your hips up to help, pulling away from his kiss to watch as he gently begins to sink himself into you. 

You lower yourself slowly to meet him, adjusting to the feel of him inside of you. He’s smiling at you broadly now and you can’t help but blush under his gaze. He presses a kiss to your nose, your eyebrows, your forehead, peppering you with kisses until you’re nearly giggling at the show of affection. Neither of you are moving yet, just enjoying being pressed this close together. Finally you move, experimentally sliding your hips forward. 

His hands fly to grip your hips and he helps you set a pace, moving up and down in a nearly bouncing motion on top of him. The pace picks up and you lace your hands with his as he thrusts up into you, the sounds of skin meeting and your hitching breathing fills the quiet room. He’s muttering something under his breath, you’re not sure what language it’s in but you hear your name thrown in there and can’t help but smile down at his angelic face, dazed eyes, bruised lips. 

You feel that wave of pleasure mounting again, rolling up towards the pit of your stomach. His movements have become sloppier, his breath heaving and hair slicked back against his forehead with sweat. 

“I’m -“ he stutters, meeting your gaze he’s unable to finish the thought. You understand what he means, you’re close too. You watch his face as the wave hits and he comes, eyes glued to yours as he releases into you. You follow shortly after, falling forward onto him as you did earlier. He puts his arms around you and you ride it out together. You can hear his heart beating erratically in time with your own as you clutch onto his shoulders. 

As the fog fades you realize that Julian was right. You can’t come back from this, what you’ve just shared was holy. You don’t want to come back from this. You’re absolutely resolved now, whatever happens you’re not leaving his side. 

Julian sighs beneath you and you lift your head up to look at him. He smiles, bringing his hands up to brush your hair out of your face. You lay there for a few minutes, lost in the moment with him.

“That was…” He finally murmurs.

“I know.” You say, unable to hide the grin as he leans up to kiss you for the thousandth time in an hour. 

“Come on let's get up before Mazelinka gets back.” He laughs. He gently rolls you off of him and begins to stand up, offering a hand to help you up. “Let’s go take a bath.”


End file.
